Meet Beau:


   Name: Beau
   Age: 1984
   Height: 5’8
   Body Type: Stocky
   Occupation: Truck driver / “Entrepreneur”
   First Outfit: Jeans, dress shirt, leather jacket
   Fun Fact: Never without his white, Dior, douche, sunglasses


There I was, smug with Unemployment Enjoyment when I received a message from Beau.  For the record, he referred to himself as Beau.

He was funny and flirtatious, European and also unemployed.  We quickly exchanged numbers and BBM’d the day away while I slothed hungover on the couch.  Beau asked if I’d like to grab a coffee that night, I obliged and we met at a Starbucks in Surrey.  He had my tea waiting for me when I breezed in—late as usual—and we sat outside chatting until the sun went down.  As the evening set in it got chilly, so we so we migrated (by foot) to a nearby bar for some drinks.  I inquired why he hadn’t driven to the date and he admitted he had lost his license.

He explained that just as the police had started cracking down on the new drinking and driving laws, he had gotten dinged up in Penticton.  By the time it went to trial, the new laws had been implemented and he was going to be tried under them.  He had had his license suspended, had mega fines to pay and will need to have a breathalyzer installed in his ride.

“Why didn’t you drive?” he countered.

I explained that had had to un-insure my car during Unemployment Enjoyment.  Why I was unemployed is a different blog.

By this time our drinks had evaporated and he spent the last few minutes of the date trying to trick me into letting him accompany me home.  I declined this oh-so-gentlemanly offer.

The following night, I checked my new messages on POF.   No more than 20- minutes after I had logged off, Beau called and drunkenly chewed me out:

“How DARE you go back online after our date!” he shouted.  But for him to know that I had logged into POF, he would have to have been online himself.  When I pointed this out, he said he had “connections” at POF and they notified him when I was online.

OK, bud.

Insulted by what he thought of my intelligence, I told him not to speak to me like that and that I was getting off the phone.

“YOU TALK TO ME NOW, OR YOU TALK TO ME NEVER!”  were his final screaming words.

I just hope he keeps his promises.

Check out our next fool!*

One comment

  1. Fish Fanatic says:

    I’m starting to see a pattern here…

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